Dating Advice: Don't Sabotage a Special Relationship

You're dating a new guy, and you're crazy about him. You're feeling vulnerable, you definitely don't want to get hurt, so you call a few friends to analyze things he's said to get their perspective. Is this a good idea?

Not really.

While it's tempting to give friends an I-said-he-said account of your conversations with a new love, it's a big mistake. You destroy whatever intimacy that developed. If you want a special relationship, keep it special by keeping it between the two people it involves: Him and you.

(Discount this advice if this man has ever hit you or threatened you in any way. In that case, RUN FOR THE HILLS. Dial 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) for help!).

As for a normal new boyfriend, your friends do not know him any better than you do (unless they're his sisters, in which case you should definitely keep quiet about him).

Do not invite other people to speculate about your relationship. It's not their place, and it's none of their business. Trust yourself to make the right decision about whether or not he is the one for you.

Avoid asking questions like, "Do you think he likes me?" and "What do you think it meant when he...?" Use a man's actions to gauge his feelings for you. If you don't understand something he did or said, ask him about it. For instance, "You asked me to meet you at 6:30, but you didn't show up until 7:15. Was there a lot of traffic?"

See what he has to say for himself. Does he seem genuinely sorry, or does he pull the same stunt the next time? Respond accordingly.

Acknowledge your own feelings, always: Do you feel good around him? Confident? Attractive? Or do you feel insecure? Stupid? Fat and ugly? You know how you feel around someone who likes you, so seek your own counsel.

When you discuss your relationship with other people, you cheapen it. You undermine it, too, because you've made it subject to others' opinions. You've raised the stakes because if the relationship tanks, you might as well have taken out an ad in the New York Times.

Give your new relationship the dignity it deserves and keep it to yourself. Offer it care and attention. Trust yourself to let it develop as it should. If it's meant to be, you'll know it.

If it's not, you'll know it,too.

Terry MacDonald is the happily married author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Sign up for free dating tips at http://www.marrysmart.com . For Dating Advice (Almost) Daily, go to http://happygirlmusing.blogspot.comClickbank Ebook
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Yellow Pages Advertising: Will Funny Make You Money?

How many times has a humorous radio or TV ad caused you to actually buy the advertised product? While some of the most successful ads have used humor Wendys Wheres the beef? ads for example - far too many funny ads utterly fail to generate increased business or ROI; more than half the ads on any given Super Bowl fall into this category - anyone remember the Petco sock puppet?

For radio and TV ads, humor or surprise serve the same purpose as eye-catching graphics in a Yellow Pages ad. A humorous ad will actually get you to consciously listen to the ad and this is a good thing in an age when more and more of us are tuning out (physically and mentally) advertising. But, when the humor is a separate element from the message of the ad, prospects remember the joke but not the business, and the ad budget is wasted on entertaining prospects rather than persuading them to buy.

So does this mean Yellow Page advertisers shouldnt worry about eye-catching graphics? Of course not! Yellow Pages advertising is one step up over other mediums because rather than tuning the ads out as background noise, prospects are actually looking for them! But you still have to break through the clutter. Your Yellow Page ad has to have the design chops to visually overpower the other ads, relegating the competition into the background as the prospect focuses on what YOU have to say.

The point is that eye-popping graphics are discarded by the reader when they are gratuitous. The message carried by the graphic has to be tied into the emotional needs of the customer and has to reinforce and lead into the persuasive message of the copy. Otherwise, your Yellow Page advertising budget will be wasted as people smile at your graphic and then move on to call someone else.

A genuine Yellow Page ad design expert doesn't think of your ad in terms of separate elements. They dont use separate or stand-alone strategies to design your graphic, then use another strategy for the headline, and another for the copy, etc. The "successful" Yellow Page ad design process simply isnt modular; all of the elements have to work together to move your reader to call YOU first!

So forget about catching their eye with graphics and THEN persuading prospects with the copy. The graphic elements of your ad have to catch their eye WHILE SIMULATNEOUSLY establishing an emotional connection with and persuading your customer.

Also, notice I said graphic elements and not graphics. The font size and style, spacing, proper use of negative or white space, and eye-flow contribute as much to the visual appeal of your Yellow Page ad as the pictures. Make sure your Yellow Page ad design professional has the design background to successfully orchestrate these elements for maximum impact!

Are you contemplating humor in your next Yellow Page ad design? Remember, there's nothing funny about wasting ad dollars on a loser Yellow Page ad that will run for an entire year. A holistic approach that considers both the emotional needs of your target audience AND the interdependence of its parts is crucial to your success.

John MoranaWork At Home Agent
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